WHEN HARRY MET SALLY
I think that polygamy is one of the worst possible concepts ever created. Marriage to one person is hard. Marriage to multiple is torture . I should know. I have two husbands.
If you’ve read any of my previous blogs you know that I’m happily married to one of the good guys. We’ve got a pretty awesome life going on – awww. He’s husband number one. The life one. The love one. The ‘til death do you part one.
What you may or may not know is that for about fifteen years I’ve had another man in my life. Two years ago I irreversibly tied my life to his with three little letters, LLC. He’s husband number two. The work one. The friend one. The I’ll call you out on your crap every time one. We’ll call him Richard; sometimes I’ll call him Dick.
Richard is also happily married to a total angel of a woman who I love. She most definitely has golden wings waiting for her in heaven for dealing with him. They have a gorgeous daughter and little lady number two on the way. They’ve got a great life. Note – said life is also proof that God has an amazing sense of humor – player’s curse.
Recently, someone made an off-handed comment to me about Richard and I “working together”. I was rendered speechless with offense. In 2012 can men and women not be friends? Harry and Sally didn’t think so. Well, Harry didn’t anyway.
This got me thinking. Why do I have this guy in my life? Admittedly I’d never given our relationship much thought, it always just was. It was an easy like Sunday morning type of friendship. For the last fifteen years it went like this…
Richard took every 4AM phone call from 3000 miles away knowing on the other end of the line was a drunken mess, a broken heart or a terrified kid with a big life problem.
Richard would always manage to make me laugh until I cried or cry until I laughed. Either way, it always felt better.
He wiped away proud tears as I walked down the aisle on my wedding day. Five years later I wiped away tears after seeing Richard’s raw love as he watched his baby girl being born.
He was there when it mattered. More importantly, he was there when it didn’t.
A few months ago someone sent me the most unprofessional email I have ever received. Before I could even craft a response back I saw one from Richard in my inbox. He said, ”Aside from my Wife, Daughter and Mother, Kristy is the most important woman in my life. Period. For you to say anything about her means you never took the opportunity to get to know her because everything she does in her life is done with the utmost class and elegance.”
For me, at that moment, our friendship came full circle and into sharp view. We had each other’s back. Always had. Always would. That’s why it worked. Ours is a pass-no-judgment, extraordinarily uncomplicated friendship. Now it’s also a let’s do this thing and kick some ass partnership.
Can men and women be friends? Absolutely. More importantly they need to be. It gives life a perspective, an insight, a balance. It helps…a lot.
Richard and I recently met up at a trendy, little café in NYC. It was a gorgeous day and we sat outside tucked into a perfect sidewalk table. A young waitress/wanna-be-model came to drop drinks at our table. She said she would be back for our order. Richard and I got to talking business.
Our waitress approached. I knew Richard so well. It was almost unfair what I was about to do. Almost. The waitress arrived.
Richard, “I’ll have the power protein omelet with eight egg whites. Side of turkey bacon and..” I cut him off.
I looked at Richard and said, “Are you STILL having that erectile bladder issue thing? Is your Dr. still making you eat only egg whites? Why don’t you take Viagra?”
Richard tightens his jaw, widens his eyes and smiles. I smile widely back. The adorable waitress looks at Richard disgusted.
Richard’s face is frozen. I look up. “Guy problems.” I shrug and smile at her. “I’ll just take a coffee.” The waitress walks away.
I burst out laughing.
Richard, “For real.”
I laugh so hard I start to cry. I manage to chuckle out “Sorry. Had to.” I pause and look up. “Hey Dick – you jump….”
Richard’s eyes start tearing from laughing too. He looks up at me. “I jump.”
A woman at the table next to us has just watched this whole act transpire and signals the waitress. “I’ll have what she’s having…”
Written by Kristy McLellan, BuggyLOVE Co-Founder
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